What makes a choice we’ve made, a mistake? I watched a film the other night about life choices as viewed by a woman on her death bed. She was lamenting past ‘mistakes’ and came to the conclusion that you can’t make mistakes and so you shouldn’t live in fear of making them.
I’ve been saying for a long time, to anyone who will listen, and especially to myself, that ‘everything is perfect’, which I think is just another way of saying that we don’t make ‘mistakes’. It goes along with my saying that ‘there is no such thing as a coincidence’. But that’s for another day.
What I took away from the film is not only that we can’t make mistakes, but that if we had chosen the ‘other road’ it would have been ‘right’ as well. What we choose is what is for us. It is our reality from that moment on. If we lament it, then we’re not really living it. Doesn’t that put us in some sort of Never-land? You’re not living the life you didn’t choose and you’re not really committed to the one you did.
To lament a choice is to open wide the door of your life to doubt. It’s to constantly ask, ‘Did I do the right thing?’ It drags us back to the point of choice, where we are suspended until such time as we come to terms with what we did choose. Watching the character on her death bed, grappling with her fears, I wondered whether we have to wait until we die to find peace, or if we can consciously resolve these doubts at an earlier point, leaving ourselves free to enjoy life.
And we could consider what happens if we don’t choose. What if life seems to happen to us and we feel we have no choice? I’m pretty sure that if I don’t make a choice, that is also a choice. I think you can be so afraid to choose that you let life choose for you – but it’s no less of a choice for all that.
We get the tool of free will on this planet and it is our greatest opportunity and our greatest responsibility. To choose is to exercise our prerogative as human beings to participate in the experience of duality; this way or… that way. Which will it be?
And here’s a mind-bender! What if every time there is a choice to be made, one part of our being makes one choice and another part makes the other choice, branching off endlessly to infinity? What if we can split as often as we make decisions and we’re not as finite as we think we are? We have no proof that we can do this but we have no proof that we can’t either.
Wouldn’t that be the ultimate waste, if you lamented not taking one of the options when all the time another part of you did make the other choice and lived out the consequence of that choice? You would literally be ruing something that didn’t happen! It would be such a waste of time and energy. If we knew this were so, we could make our choices without being afraid that we had missed an opportunity. I ask myself, would I live my life differently if I were to see it this way?